It was about 9am, on a weekday; an ordinary day. I had woken up at 7am with the intention to start my day early, get things done, and have a great day.
But here it was again, that all-too-familiar feeling.
Instead of jumping out of bed and going about my life, I had hit the snooze button (again and again) and finally given up on getting up. Is this a common occurance in your life as well?
This is a Story of How My Pain Taught Me to Let Go and Live the Life I Trully Desired.
I’d now slept in 2 hours, and had woken up feeling, once again, this relentless, daunting, overbearing dissatisfaction with my entire life.
I’d felt this way almost every morning for the past 3 months at least, maybe more, and yet I had just kept on keeping on, trying to ignore it, trying to fix it, hoping that there was something I could do that would make the way things were going get better.
But today I couldn’t ignore it, or get around it.
The full gravity of how unhappy I was and had been for quite some time hit me like a ton of bricks, as if all the times I’d tried to ignore it had just boomeranged back at me all at the same time.
It was truly an F.M.L. moment. Maybe you can relate?
Well I’m glad that this happened to me.
Things that Look Great on Surface, aren't Neccesarily so great.
They say that sometimes people will choose to give themselves the pain that they’re used to, rather than take a chance on the unknown.
I’d never considered myself to be that type of person, but here I was, and here I had been, choosing this unbearable, soul-killing pain of the hell I had created for myself.
And more so, from an outside perspective, my life looked pretty good.
- I had a great job, with a flexible schedule.
- Good money.
- The freedom to make the decisions I thought were best.
- I was doing a good job at it too.
- I had a girlfriend.
- A house.
- Financial stability.
- Basically, many of the things that a lot of people wish they had.
Yet my soul felt like it was dying, one day at a time. Every move I made, every word I said and decision I’d made for the past several months felt like a lie.
I was so unbelievably unhappy
Pain is Here to Teach Us, Not Punish Us.
That morning I let myself suffer.
- I felt how unhappy I was.
- And I asked myself how it had come to this.
I thought about all the ideals of my younger, more alive self, and I wept for the compromises I had made for what I had tricked myself into thinking was a happier way of life. I had been smothering my heart and soul, and ignoring its screams for more air, more life.
And finally, while searching through this load of crap that I had created for myself, the answer became crystal clear:
Message from Guided Mind Learn to let go of the things no longer serving you.
For years now I had been adding things to my life to try to improve this unhappiness I was feeling.
- I was adding and experimenting with different spiritual practices and self-improvement methods to try to nurture my soul.
- I was adding herbs, remedies, and exercise routines to help my body feel better.
- And I was even adding books, ideas, discussions, and information to my relationship to try to improve the issues I was having there.
But in all this struggling I’d been through, in spite of all this pain, the one thing I had not been willing to do was the opposite. I was not willing to let go of anything.
Sometimes We Just Need to Let Go.
I was clinging to my job, clinging to my relationship, clinging to my routines and comfort zones with an iron fist.
And in that moment I finally realized the one thing I had not done for years: Let go of what was not serving me.
It was not about fixing things, or improving things, or finding solutions at all. It was about having the courage to recognize what wasn’t working for me, and letting go. I realized that all the changes I had been yearning for, that feeling of freedom and being in tune with my soul I had been missing was waiting for me right around the corner, as soon as I was willing to make room for it again in my life.
I can’t tell you how grateful I am that the pain of the way I was living my life finally became so unbearable that it forced me to take a better look at myself.
Letting Go is not Easy.
Over the next few months I made the commitment to let go of the things that were no longer serving me, starting with the two biggest ones: my job, and my relationship.
I can’t tell you how terrifying this was, to let go of both of these at the same time.
Related article: 7 ways to let go and find peace right now.
And yet, the very second that I did let go of that which was no longer serving me, magic began happening in my life again.
- I found new ways of making money. Ways that were more in alignment with my passion and purpose.
- I found the inspiration and guidance I needed to heal the emotional and physical issues I’d been struggling with.
- New people began to show up in my life, with messages and lessons for me that helped me make the next step.
- I was even able to begin a new relationship with a woman who is absolutely perfect for me.
I share this story in the hopes that it may help shake anyone who may be in a similar situation that I was in to take a second look at how they are living. I’d challenge anyone to remember that it’s not always about adding something to your life, or “solving the problem”.
Sometimes it’s all about letting go, and recognizing when something just isn’t right for you.
So how am I doing now? Still recovering from this rough phase of my life.
But synchronicity has returned. I can feel the guidance and support from the universe again. I can feel hope, and happiness, and gratitude. And very importantly, I feel excitement for the future - the unknown future - that I am creating for myself.
Message from Guided Mind You can learn to enjoy change with this meditation mp3. Try it now.
If you can relate to this story, please don’t do what I did and torture yourself unnecessarily for long periods of time. Remember that your pain is not there to torment you or to be “fixed”, but to teach you, and ultimately help you set yourself free.
Ashton Aiden is a certified life coach, a brainwave entrainment geek, a lover of dogs, and a passionate advocate of the human potential. He spends most of his time working through his website, brainwavelove.com, to educate the public on the powerful benefits of brainwave entrainment technology.
When not doing this, he enjoys coaching people on the art of manifestation, providing spiritual commentary, and exploring the outdoors in his home state with his dog, Biff, and his girlfriend Dechen. He can be reached at [email protected], or on facebook.com/brainwavelove