Nobody is perfect, right. As much as we strive to live a pure and simple life, sometimes we slip and let toxicity into our lives. It actually just kinda sneaks in before we have a chance to check it at the door. When we do realize we are behaving poorly, it’s already too late.
Not too late to change it, but too late to have prevented it in the first place.
What exactly is a toxic behaviour and how can it affect us?
I’ve only listed 9 but I’m sure there are hundreds of things we do that suck the life out of us. When we recognize some of these behaviours, it is quite easy to change them. Simply stop doing them.
Easier said than done? Not really. When you know what it’s doing to your soul, wouldn’t you want it to stop immediately anyway? I know I would.
Let’s have a quick look at what some of these toxic behaviours are and without judging anyone, I’m sure you can recognize yourself in some of these. I know I’m guilty of one or two. Listed in no particular order, here they are.
We all do it. Some of us more than others.
- We talk about the girl next door or the new guy that just started working here.
- We talk about how the Brown’s just split up.
- And “Did you hear why they separated?”
Did you know that when we talk about people it shows an insecurity or jealousy in us? Boom. Where are you lacking in your life that you feel the need to cut down someone else’s life? Have a think about that for a moment.
Ok this is just plain terrible. One thing I can honestly say I don’t do. Not even white lies.
There’s no point or purpose to this. Who are you lying to and why? It doesn’t even make any sense to do this and I still don’t understand why so many people still lie.
You think the truth hurts, check out a lie. Nothing hurts more than that.
3. Worrying about things that haven’t happened yet.
Let me repeat that if I may. Things that haven’t happened yet
. Why would you waste your time and energy worrying about something that hasn’t even happened?
I know a lot of us play out a situation in our head and our first instinct is to play it out with a bad ending.
Why do we do that? And I’ve done this one myself. Worry is a natural emotion/feeling. It’s up to you to control it and stop it in its tracks before it spirals out of control. That’s when the stress kicks in and our blood pressure rises.
No need for all this now, is there?
Also read: 8 Thins You are Doing that Make You Toxic.
4. Holding a grudge.
There’s an old saying “holding a grudge is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die”.
Think about that for a sec. The poison you are drinking is the grudge. You are swallowing every drop and you are mad and pissed off to a point of no return.
Expecting the other person to die? Honestly they could care less what you think. Hell they probably aren’t even thinking about you anyway.
So why on earth are you wasting your time and energy grudging on someone? Go pick some flowers and bring them to a nursing home. Really. Spend time doing happy things. Not brewing and stewing over silly things.
- The girls in the magazine are beautiful.
- Sally has a beautiful body.
- Jimmy has a nice car.
- The Whites just bought a brand new house.
With every turn, someone somewhere has something better or nicer than we do. Our first reaction is jealousy.
There is no need to be jealous really. We all have something special, unique and beautiful inside of us. We also all have something that someone else wishes they had.
Just be grateful for who you are and what you have. You are perfect and blessed exactly the way you are. Embrace it.
6. You’ve already lived the past.
Oh how we love to hang on to what happened 5, 10 or even 25 years ago. We still go on and on about it to whoever will listen. Why shouldn’t we? Who we are today is because of what happened to us yesterday.
Well, yes, you’re right. Sort of. Who we are today is the result of the way we chose to handle the past. We didn’t all have silver spoons in our mouths. Some of us were dealt really shitty hands.
It is what it is. Be done with the past. No one wants to hear it, really. Just tell us something happy and joyful. That’s all we want to hear now.
7. I love me.
Watch how you talk to yourself. You are listening. Make sure your self-talk is loving, kind, compassionate, gentle, caring and supportive.
Talking bad about yourself to yourself is probably the worst thing you can do. Treat yourself in a totally loving and positive manner.
When you do this, you will be able to see how awesome you are and how much more awesome you will become.
Be positive, both towards yourself and others - we can help you do so with our guided meditation album.
8. Woe is me.
Always the victim never the victor. Sad things keep happening to you and you can’t wait to tell the next person you see. The more you talk about it, the more depressed you get and the more terrible things keep happening to you.
You think your life is bad? Go hang out in a city where they just had a devastating earthquake or tsunami. Stop whining. We’re getting sick of listening to it and there will come a point where no one will want to be around you. How lonely will that be?
9. Negative Nancy.
We are really truly sad for you and wish, just once, you could see something in a positive light. Not everything is bad. Honest.
Try to find the good in things and when you do you will see that more good things will show up in your life. It’s a universal law. It has to be. You are sucking the life out of us and we don’t want to hang around you anymore.
Here's how to free yourself from all the stress.
This list covers many things that we all do almost on a daily basis. Next time you catch yourself doing any of these, stop it. Immediately. Turn it around and tell yourself that your soul is beautiful and deserves only loving, kind and caring thoughts.
Once you get into this habit, in no time you will see that these behaviours will become a thing of the past and your soul will illuminate beauty.
Do you find yourself doing any of these toxic behaviours? Are you ready to stop them? Feel free to share in the comments!